You Have the Rest of Your Life to be “Grown”

We are 6 days into August, which means school is right around the corner. I know some of you PrettyGirls are shopping and getting your outfits together to slay during that first week of school (we used to do it too)! When I look back at high school photos of myself and friends and compare them to the high school girls of today, the differences are surreal! I know we are in the days of 22 inch weaves, snatched eyebrows, makeup contouring, and being alluring, independent women but the keyword here is WOMEN. If you’re still in high school and younger, there’s no reason for you to be out here trying to look like a 25 year old. Let me explain…

When I was in high school the average girl wore eyeliner and mascara…that’s it. I’m now seeing so many younger girls walking around with full faces of makeup. Why? Maybe school hours have changed, but unless there was a late day, we had to be at school by 8:00 am-ish. I value sleep, and I definitely wasn’t waking up an extra 30 minutes earlier to put on makeup for the same people I saw everyday. Nope, wasn’t happening. Boys still flirted with us and called us cute and we thought we were super cute too (lol). Of course, if we were going to the Friday night football game or to the movies with friends that weekend we may spruce our looks up a bit with some eyeshadow, or bronzer but that’s about it.

Circa 2009. Eyeliner, mascara, a hint of eyeshadow and lipgloss is all we needed.
Circa 2009. Eyeliner, mascara, a hint of eyeshadow and lipgloss is all we needed.

More importantly, there’s going to come a time when you need makeup more regularly. Just wait until you get to college and are pulling all nighters and looking like a zombie the next day or going out with friends and on dates. You don’t want to be 17 looking 22. That’s going to draw the wrong type of attention and a lot of potential problems. The time for you to use and explore makeup is coming. For now just love and take care of that natural, beautiful and vibrant skin! You don’t need anything extra. Enjoy looking youthful. It won’t last forever.

Weaves, weaves, weaves. I got my first sew-in as a senior in high school and it was only 12 inches! Over time, my  weaves have lengthened. The most I’ve had was 24 inches. But by this time I was 21. When I was in high school, most girls weren’t even wearing weaves (this was during the time that weaves were still a tad taboo). Rocking your relaxed hair was still the most popular thing to do, so you would never see a weave past 14 inches (we still wanted it to at least look natural). Nowadays, I hear that high schools (and even middle schools) are filled with girls with hair down to their butts! Of course, there are still those rocking their relaxed hair, and #TeamNatural is on the scene as well. But it’s still amazing to me how much popularity weaves have gained in high schools and younger girls in general. I know how much hair costs and when you get into those longer lengths, we’re talking some serious cash!

Senior Day circa 2010. Our first weaves! Kindra and I surprised so many of our friends lol.
Senior Day circa 2010. Our first weaves! Kindra and I surprised so many of our friends!

If it’s you spending the money, there are so many other things that you could be putting your money towards: college savings, going out with friends, clothes, music… and out of all things, you want to spend $150+ on hair? If your parents or someone else buying the hair for you, just think about how much extra cash you could have if you weren’t spending it on hair. You don’t need it, PrettyGirl! There’s no one in your APPROPRIATE age range that you should be trying to impress with expensive hair. You spending that much money to impress teenage guys? Guys my age are still wowed by how much money women spend on hair. They don’t know the difference and don’t care. If you’re reading this and thinking “Well, money isn’t an issue” or maybe you know the hair plug and get all the good hair deals, my question is still who are you trying to impress? Now, I know a lot of both older and younger girls turn to weave when they’re transitioning from relaxed to natural, but still there are alternatives if you’re on the younger end of that wave. Try something like nice long braids or twists! They can look great while still age appropriate, and they’re CHEAPER! Weaves definitely redefine your look and make you look older. As I stated earlier, looking older can draw attention from older men that you aren’t prepared to deal with and shouldn’t be dealing with in high school. This leads me into my last point: clothing.

Circa 2009. 16-17 years old. This is how we looked in high school. And yes that is co-founder, Kindra on the far left and Pres., Raven next to her.
Circa 2009. 16-17 years old. This is how we looked in high school. And yes that is co-founder, Kindra on the far left and Pres., Raven next to her.

Screen t-shirts, colored skinny jeans, name belts, costume jewelry and Aeropostale are a few of the things that were popular when I was in school. Looking back, I can admit that some of our fashion trends were awful but they were age appropriate. At 22 year old I often hear that I look so young and many of my friends hear the same thing. I do contribute most of this to genetics, but I think another huge reason we keep getting this is not that we look young, but so many younger girls are starting to look older.

We live in a day and age where being thick is glorified (almost demanded) [See previous post, Petite Girls Have Feelings Too] and showing off your curves and body and general is even more glorified. There are lots of reasons, self-esteem issues, and media influences that must be taken into consideration, but we’ll save that for another blog post. Simply put, your clothes are a direct reflection of you! It doesn’t matter how nice of a girl you’re really are, if you’re out here dressed like a heaux, that’s how people will classify you. No ifs, ands, or buts. If you want to be approached as a young lady, then you should dress and carry yourself as such. And dress your AGE. Stop trying look grown and sexy all the time. The time for that is coming quicker than you think.

highschool
Circa 2010. 17-18 years old. A night out with friends.

To wrap things up, in no way am I judging you high school and younger PrettyGirls! But, I’ve been there and done that. I wasn’t perfect, no where near it. But looking back, one thing I appreciate my parents, and all of the other adults in my life, for the most is they didn’t let me experience things to early. I remember being in middle school and begging my mom to let me wear eyeliner. But she would always tell me that  I shouldn’t try to grow up so fast. When it’s appropriate for me to wear eyeliner, that’s when I could. The same applied to all other makeup, clothing, dating, curfews, etc. During the time, I would try to argue my mom on some things but it was honestly one of the best things she could have done.

Of course, there were some things my friends and I would sneak and do but for the most part, we all experienced things at the appropriate times in our lives. And I promise, you will enjoy it SO much more! If you’ve been dressing, looking and TRYING to act like you’re 23 since you were 17, what are you going to have to look forward to when you are 23?

This is the only time in your life that’ll you’ll be young and it’s such a small portion. Don’t rush it! Life is already moving fast and doesn’t need any extra help. You have the rest of your life to be grown and once you enter adulthood for real, there’s no going back. Your time is coming. Just sit back, be patient and enjoy the ride. 🙂

-Jessica, Founder of The Peek-A-Boo PrettyGirl Foundation

2 thoughts on “You Have the Rest of Your Life to be “Grown”

  1. I found this by mistake or maybe it wasn’t, I am way way beyond this stage in life, but I am so proud to know that there are young women, who have this out look on life and pray that you will succeed in your endeavor. Proud Senior at Right Direction Church International.

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